Follow by Email

Thursday, March 22, 2012

I Can't Be the Only One

Why do I come home everyday and look in my fridge and the pantry to see if a tasty snack will just magically appear?

It's insanity, you know.  Doing the same thing, over and over and over, expecting something different.  But I do this, literally, every day.  

Which is really crazy, because I do the grocery shopping.  Why don't I remember tasty snacks while I am at the grocery?  I can grow most of what I like to eat with the exception of chocolate, beer, tortilla chips, Goldfish crackers, etc.  It's like every time I go to the grocery I'm on some stupid health kick.  It doesn't help that I am literally the only one in this house that really snacks.  The boy doesn't snack, because he is trying to get a 6-pack.  At 15, this consumes pretty much every free moment the kid has.

No joke, the other night we were all watching a movie and we paused it for some reason, he stands up, stands in front of the TV, and he says:
"Dude, do you see my 6-pack?"
"Can you see my 6-pack?"
"Uh, no.  Should I be able to see it?"
"Well, we just aren't in the right lighting."

I expect to hear about lighting only when celebrities or photographers are involved.  Not from a 15-year-old.  What has my life come to when this is the most exciting thing that happens to me on a Saturday?  I don't dare say night because I haven't seen the other side of midnight in at least 3 years.  Maybe longer.  

The things that happen in this house at times should be taped.  Monday evening I was coming out to the mud room to fold clothes and the kid jumped out at me in his track 8 o'clock at night.

"What. Are. You. Doing?"
"You can't break in a track suit."
"You totally can."
"Dude, I look so fast!"

And last night, because he thinks I'm a loser out of touch with reality, he does what he calls a "dance".  He looked more like Rain Man about to throw a tantrum because he was going to miss People's Court.  As I laughed maniacally, he told me it was a dance, and that I could Google it.  So I did.  And here is this to waste 2:18 of your lives.

I'll be damned.  The world IS coming to an end. :)


  1. Holy crap I watch the whole thing. I don't even have sound on this computer and all I could think of was he was trying to ice skate without the ice, or the skates.
    At least you have boys, all mine are girls and all I hear is, "Does this go with this outfit", "WHERE'S MY BELT!!!" "I can't believe you are wearing that" and it goes on, and on, and on.
    Oh here's one for ya, "Hey Dad, can you pick me up some Girl things at the store?"
    "What are girl things?" I ask
    Yup, should not have asked that question but was relieved they needed them.
    Yea, you know what I mean......

    1. Actually, 2 older girls and just the one boy at home. And we refer to him as our third daughter because he can spend hours in the bathroom and has to do his hair before we go anywhere. And really? You had to ask? At one point in time there was 3 females in this house and I was going to start buying "girl things" in bulk... off-subject, but holy crap! Why is that stuff so expensive? It's almost like they know you can't do without so they make the prices ridiculous.

  2. If someone started dancing with me like that I'd give them something stanky alright. And it wouldn't be my leg. Lol!

    1. Not with me. I keep distance from teenagers. They weird me out. LOL.

  3. You have an award on my blog.